25 February: Dying from Exhaustion

Hey guuuuuuuuys, I’m still tired. I am very tired. I am exhausted and I am breaking down anytime now. I slept about 8 hours? But I’m exhausted af. I guess I’m just mentally tired and it affects me physically. Damn, I got loads of work to do man…. When can I stop feeling tired? When, how? God, I swear I’m doing my best to feel better but I’m tired!!! I have no idea what is draining all my energy, I can’t help but to feel tired, maybe it is all the changes that is affecting me mentally, hell yea I made changes in an instant but it’s tiring. I can go on writing about how tired I am but I think it’s time to type something nice for you guys to read (:

You guys can see the picture right? I’m excited for my birthday! It’s going to be a blast, I don’t really care about my birthday though.. What I’m excited about is to meet lots of my friends, friends since young and till now, friends from everywhere and basically all my friends. Would be really happy to see all of them because I genuinely love all of my friends! Such a lovely dude right? Hahaha I know. I have a thing for meet up sessions, like to bond and laugh and just spend time together like we once did. At one point of our life, we have certain groups of friend we do stupid stuff with. Wouldn’t it be great to bring all of them from different time to one place and hang out altogether? Not to forget my family members too! I just love the idea of seeing everyone I know and spending time together, it makes me happy.

So to all my friends that is looking at that cute little invitation card that I made myself kekeke, if you would like to come, you can come! On that day just come over and have fun! If you need anything just text me or give me a call, I’ll be sure to get you to where I am. Kinda excited kinda not because I’m stressed out. And when you got pimples to prove that you’re stress, YOU ARE. F*ck me, I hope this pimple gets off me before my birthday. I’m halfway done planning everything out but I am lost af. I feel like there is so much to do and so little time to do it. I know organizing things is a piece of cake for me but I’m just too tired to work everything out properly..

My mental health isn’t helping me with anything. It is just one word you guys already know, TIRED. Been so busy with improving on myself I couldn’t focus and multitask on much things now… It is because I got too much to improve on, I am a shitty person. That’s why there is so much to do about me and also why it is tiring af, I guess.

But I know I just need time time time. We all have our love-hate relationship with time but I am hating on time BIG TIME now. Been alright, going to school and eating better. But just couldn’t focus on anything else because I’m like all out on myself. I wanna be a better person and I know I can be. I’m a rushy guy, I can’t stand things undone. Maybe that’s why I’m stressing the hell out of myself but it is just me… I like to get things done immediately.

But just wanna take the time to thank god and appreciate what I’m blessed with. Ever since I went to the temple to pray, I learned and understand. I found peace within and felt better. I still have some feelings I shouldn’t have anymore though. But I found peace and understood everything, I gave it all to Gods above. Fate, my life or anything? Trust and leave it all to God. And live my life to the fullest and best-est (no such word but I like it). No point expecting or holding onto anything that is already gone, there’s nothing left to hold. I’m not sure if I’m doing things right or not by holding onto the fate I prayed for but I feel like I’m gonna get better this way and let you go easier, so why not? But a friend woke me up though, he said: yes there might be fate but what if fate to be just as a friend…… Okay cool….. I’m feeling better than before but not super good but we all started from somewhere right?

Alright my diary is getting sadder with every word I’m typing out so I guess that all right? Talked about my birthday, oh yea did I mentioned? It is exactly in a week time, this is so stressful but I know my party is gonna be lit!!!! Alright guys, thank you all again for reading and I appreciate you all, beautiful people (:

Adios!

  • Email: waynensy@gmail.com
  • Instagram: @waynensy
  • Twitter: @waynensy
  • Snapchat: wayne-nsy

you can follow me manually or just scroll all the way to the bottom, cheers! don’t forget to like and comment too!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s